How to Safely Communicate with a bad person

In a communication setting, we often avoid contact with bad individuals, so it is best to immediately terminate the interaction when we encounter someone displaying ‘toxic’ behavior. However, not all relationships are easy to withdraw from, and sometimes we have to maintain a friendly demeanor even in daily encounters. However, yielding in this manner only increases personal discomfort as the other person continues to assert their power and oppress us. How can we maintain the relationship while ensuring our safety in such a situation?

People have a saying: “Go with a Buddhist dressed in a frock, go with a ghost dressed in paper clothes.” This reminds us to behave tactfully and delicately and advises us to maintain harmony and avoid conflicts or clashes. Because if we come across malicious individuals, they will try to sabotage and harm us, causing negative impacts on our reputation, credibility, and livelihood. Sometimes, they can even jeopardize our lives if we fail to handle the situation with tact and discretion.

Certainly, when it comes to complex relationships, we can choose to ‘stop’, However, there are times when one should not sacrifice opportunities for advancement or give up solely because of one person. If the economic conditions remain challenging, it is recommended to continue the relationship to foster personal growth and strive for a better life. Additionally, our ancestors also taught us the saying “To know oneself is true progress”, which, when applied in practical situations, helps us proactively grasp the mindset of the other party.

1. Explore the circumstances to identify their weaknesses

Folklore contains the saying “the milk of human kindness”, which suggests that everyone begins life with an inherent nature of kindness and gentleness during childhood. However, as individuals grow older, they are influenced by their educational environment, especially in situations where they lack love and care from family members or witness numerous instances of injustice and unhappiness. These experiences can result in severe emotional and physical damage. As a result, they lose trust and isolate themselves, causing their inherently skeptical nature to increasingly influence their behavior and foster negative thinking, leading them to become violent, cunning, and often highly defensive towards others. They perceive this as a way to protect themselves from potentially similar situations.

According to psychologists, individuals displaying negative behavior often share a common origin in unresolved traumas. For example, Dr. Harriet Lerner, a well-known American clinical psychologist, has concluded that a majority of people who have experienced trauma tend to transmit it to others. Through extensive research and in-depth psychological analysis, she emphasizes the significance of empathy and concern for those who have been wounded.

Because if we delve deeper, everyone has a hidden side, sorrows, especially the ‘bad people’ who fear loss even more. Despite their outward eccentricity, when they are with loved ones, they will return to being emotional and responsible individuals. They may even accept personal sacrifices to exchange for happiness and peace for that person. Exploring the circumstances not only helps us gain profound insights into them but also enables us to take control of our own emotions. Moreover, understanding their weaknesses will be useful in times of need.

2. Respectful, courteous, and maintaining moderation in communication.

Regardless of our positions, each one of us undoubtedly desires to be respected by others. This is manifested through words, attitudes, and actions seriously and sincerely. It is those words that belittle, demean, and mock with a series of mocking expressions and teasing that serve as the initial trigger, causing negative individuals to feel offended and damaging their self-esteem. From there, a sense of hatred and conflict gradually arises. When they respond with anger, rudeness, or manipulative tactics, they quickly become perceived as bad persons in the eyes of others.

Therefore, in any communication setting, it is crucial to refrain from engaging in playful actions or behaviors that may demean or embarrass others. On the contrary, maintaining a polite demeanor, and speaking in a measured and serious manner, is what makes the other person feel respected and leads to their affection and trust towards us, even if they are a bad person.

Additionally, let’s observe how virtuous individuals treat others, as they never discriminate based on wealth, poverty, or social status. In communication, they consistently uphold a humble and respectful demeanor, express their words with gentleness, and show respect for personal boundaries. Consequently, this behavior often leaves a lasting positive impression in the hearts of those individuals, fostering increased admiration and esteem from others.

3. “Displaying naivety’ in the face of danger to ensure personal safety.

Inside every individual, there exist both good and bad qualities, sometimes overshadowed by greed, leading to the loss of rationality. That’s why they say the “human mind is unpredictable”, especially for deceitful individuals who can resort to any means to cause harm or manipulate others if they perceive them as dangerous or beneficial to their interests. On the contrary, as long as the other person doesn’t make them suspicious and they lose the ability to intimidate or have nothing left to use, they will be at ease and “let it go”. Therefore, if you find yourself in a malicious situation where you are facing danger from an individual or are required to interact with them, it is advisable to present yourself as innocent, unaware, or only reveal hardships when necessary to divert attention. This approach also evokes compassion, as acts of kindness emerge only when they resonate with the emotions of the heart.

By TVVN Press

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